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i spent the day at the place. i cleaned it and loved it and hollered to "These are Days" by 10,000 Maniacs. i listened to the City of Angels soundtrack, which nursed me when i missed scott in Vienna 5 years ago. when i'd run in the rain with a headset on and tears spilling off my face. when i first realized i wanted to spend LIVES with that boy. i needed to miss my leroy. i needed to spend a few hours just mourning him and loving him and preparing a sacred space for him again in my heart. and in the place. i felt alone and bizarre. but i felt good. really good. i knew each minute that i would forever cherish this time. that this was an awkward time but a growing time. slightly uncomfortable, but fascinating and freeing. i finally released myself out the front door and padded about my new digs in my sneakers, eyes big and happy. i chuckled and called out and then outright cried when i came upon parks and canyons and trees and caf�s and cities--all within walking distance of the place. this wasn't serendipity. this was hand-chosen. this was celeste knowing exactly what we needed, knowing that it was out there, and then finding it. this was celeste trusting that we create our worlds, and this go-around, mine was to have wood floors. My choice, ck [2003-05-29]
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Last five letters Gathering [2009-09-04] ?2002, Scott & Celeste. |