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So, God is teaching us a lesson: how NOT to violently maim your neighbors even though they keep you up with their raucous party until 4:00 am. Friday night we lay awake for six full hours while our neighbors conducted their orgie, which, by the sound of it, must have involved terrets syndrome, sumo wrestling, and more alcohol than a Russian liquor cabinet. Tomorrow we plan to talk to these neighbors and fellow teachers about their parties. I hope they'll be sober by then. I've had a couple days to cool down (meaning they might walk away, albeit with a limp, from our conversation). I will admit--these party-throwing neighbors of ours have been taking 6 months of Tae Kwon Do and have risen to the lofty green belt. If things were to become heated, maybe I'd be the one limping away. Well, on second thought, I'm sure that the massive brain cells destruction caused by their weekly booze binges has made their eye to hand coordination, and thus killing capabilities, as sharp as a round of brie. I'll be fine. If things get out of hand, I'll resort to my usual killer techniques: crouch in fetal position, wet myself (for sympathy), and pray they don't hit me in the face. Later, I'll give them the cold shoulder, shoot nasty glares, and talk behind their back. Passive aggression is my specialty and can be really nasty. Killer Instincts--Scottro [2003-01-02]
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